Archive for the ‘humor’ Category

Getting dressed or how you know I’m not a normal bride

Tuesday, February 2nd, 2010

So! The place is as decorated as it’s going to be, and it’s 12:30. We are supposed to be back at 2:00 for pictures, breathers etc. since the ceremony is to begin at 4:30.

Normally, this wouldn’t be a problem. However, there was one bridesmaid, all the groomsmen, the groom… they were missing. Like literally, no-one-knew-where-they-were-missing. That’s not what I was looking for at the time.

Fine. Take a breath. Move on. I gathered up the bridesmaids I had and headed over to my parents. Did I mention I forgot to feed them?


First, it’s just rude.

But, it also lead to people getting hungry (reasonably so, I’m not daft). Which lead to eating really, really quickly at my parents place before getting ready. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but remember that two needed showers. Plus hair, make up, dresses… Yeah.

Well, we made it upstairs and into the bathroom to begin the process.

Now, this is how you know I’m not a normal bride. Well, I’m sure other brides do this, but you don’t hear of it.

I helped with hair and make up on one of my ‘maids before doing my own. And might I say… she looked hot!

“Now, shake your head like this!”

We also don’t believe in privacy.

While we were upstairs, Chet was downstairs with his groomsmen. I have no idea when they showed up, but they did, and they got ready. They were also at the venue way before we were too.
Cursed make up.

Once all the ladies looked like their glamorous selves, they went in and signed the bottom of my shoes. I loved it!


Then, it was my turn. By the way, it’s about 1:45 now. Whoops.

I chose to do my own make up and hair out of frugality.
I also wanted something simple. (I looked gorgeous, by the way!)

Close ups of the dress… Our poor photographer had hell with the dress. It’s white, and all he had to work with was a white background, so there aren’t really any great shots of the full dress — until it’s on me, duh!

I’m sure she had said something snarky here.

And into the dress I go.

“Shake your head” and “shower curtain” are credited to Lindsey Speights.
All other credit goes to Thomas Boydston

Night Before

Sunday, January 31st, 2010

So! Getting ready!

On Friday, we had our rehearsal, dinner, and then spent 4 hours decorating for the wedding. Phew.

Since our pastor had to back out on us for personal reasons, we had to find a new one. We were directed to Jeff Ganz at Willis UMC. He met with us Thursday to go over the ceremony which I painstakingly wrote, then came down Friday to do the rehearsal.

After our rehearsal, we went to the Stardust Room for dinner. It was one of our favorite hang outs while in school, and one of the first places we decided to have anything at.

The rehearsal dinner was where we handed out gifts to our bridal party and families. The groomsmen all received hand made cuff links from Chet and ties from Toybreaker.

The bridesmaids received earrings, shawls, hand painted knick knack bowls and hand written letters from me.

Our parents each received a photo frame that was engraved and had one of our engagement photos in it.

And Charlotte got a little canvas print.

After the rehearsal, all of the bridal party plus some headed back to the venue and we decorated, decorated, decorated. For some reason, no photos were really taken during this, but man was it fun/intense/crazy/emotional/….

And, my friends are incredible. We had groups putting together our programs, re cutting some of the corks, ironing table runners, decorating table numbers, and helping me re design the down stairs for the ceremony (which had to be moved inside).

Once all the decorating was done (well, that we could do for the night), we left to go our separate ways. Chet and I decided to not stay together the night before because I wanted some alone time with the gals. And that was the perfect decision for us, well for me anyway.

Oh! Story! I lost his wedding band the night before the wedding. I literally had had it in my possession for about 12 hours when I lost it. That was AWESOME! At two in the morning my girls and I are running around town looking for it. Turns out, the box had wedged itself in the trunk…

Next up… day of preparations.

My Vows

Thursday, November 12th, 2009

I lost my vows last week — oops. So, I’ve decided to use these.

O hai. We here before all dese ppl and Ceiling Cat sos cat 1 and cat 2 can has marriage.

cat 1 and cat 2, marriage iz commitment and all about luv, so if u marry wifout thinkin hard about it, ur doin it wrong.

Anyone has visible reason they shud no marry? No? Gud.

cat 1 and cat 2, LOLCat Bible sez, “Luv is pashient an kind and stuff, luv no has jelusy and no shows off. It not rude, it not say UR DOIN IT WRONG. It no aligned wif basement cat but only ceiling cat. Luv protectz, trusts in all teh stuff, hopes in all teh stuff, sticks wif u in all teh stuff. FAIL? Not luv.” Dis what luv shud be for u.

cat 1, what u here for? (cat 2’s paw for marryin)

What u promis for cat 2? (I can has u, cat 2, for bein all wedded an stuff. I can has, I can hold. We can has riches, we can has no riches, we can has helf, we can has no helf, I still all luv u until ded.)

cat 2, what u here for? (cat 1’s paw for marryin)

What u promis for cat 1? (I can has u, cat 1, for bein all wedded an stuff. I can has, I can hold. We can has riches, we can has no riches, we can has helf, we can has no helf, I still all luv u until ded.)

Marriage no jus two cats, it needz other cats for supports and luv. Srsly, all u be there for them? (Yes.)
I can has bukkit wif rings?

Rings are all round, they has no end jus like your luv. cat 1, place ring on cat 2’s paw and say: I maed u a ring and I no pawn it. Wif this ring, I are wedding u. cat 2, u do same and say: I maed u a ring and I no pawn it. Wif this ring, I are wedding u.

U both now all married. Ceiling cat will now watch u kiss.

Here is cat 1 and cat 2 all married. Kthxbai.

via: Stephen

When is it okay?

Monday, November 9th, 2009

I have a question.

When is it okay to become a bridezilla? Is it ever?

via: The Durtty Bride

I feel like I have stayed incredibly up beat during the planning process. I’ve had two maids of honors step down, familial issues on both sides, a dress that disappeared then re-appeared only to not fit me at all, mailing issues, money issues and on top of all that I moved to Lincoln Nebraska and began a Doctoral program.

I have maintained a great attitude through it all. I really have, don’t judge me.

But now, now I feel like perhaps I should be a bridezilla.

Why? Because our pastor has recently called us to let us know that he can’t do our wedding.

Honestly, I feel bad for the guy. He’s taken over as a head pastor, and as such has stepped into a messy problem. And the church is telling him he can’t leave for a Saturday to do our wedding.

Have I mentioned that we are 12 days out? I didn’t? We are.

So, my question comes in because I feel like a doormat. I don’t know what else can go wrong. Well, I do, and it probably will go wrong. I suppose what I really don’t know is how to handle it anymore.

A friend of mine was just in a wedding the past weekend and she recounted to me the horror that this bride was. Ignoring birthdays, not providing enough food, being a jerk for the most part.

But her dress showed up. She didn’t have anyone step down. Her pastor was there.

I get that this is an incredibly irrational train of thought, but I would be lying to say it’s not there and present in my head.

So, would it be okay for me to fly off the handle yet?

Just as a side note, another friend of ours, in response to this newest conundrum said: “Why can’t you believe it? It is exactly the sort of thing that would happen to you guys.”

Touché my dear friend, touché.

Don’t be rude.

Thursday, October 29th, 2009

Chet and I have decided that for the guests who RSVP’d yes, and then didn’t come, we are going to bill them*.


They will receive an invoice which will be mailed out on 11/30. Recognizing that normal mailing turn around time is 4 days, we will allow 2 weeks between re-billings before we send their information to a collection agency.

Bet you didn’t know that RSVP was a contract huh?


An example of the proposed invoice:


Please click to enlarge.

*Please, dear God, know we are joking. Though, if you’re not able to make it, a call would be greatly appreciated.